My name is Lilou Sticks and for the moment, I have nowhere to call home.

So everyday, I read, take pictures, watch films, eat cinnamon buns and cookies, go to museums, drink blue water, walk, I walk a lot, a whole lot, look at mirrors, listen to music, touch fabrics, taste and smell everything around me.

This is how I am trying to remember where I come from.

If you feel the same way I do, let’s try to find our homes together.

Tuesday, 20 September 2011


I have not written all summer.

Maybe you thought I ran away somewhere.
Or maybe you thought that I did not exist anymore.
But I did not run away and I still very much exist.

Something curious has happened and that is why I have not written a word since the 15th of June.

Zouzi has left me.

It all happened the day after I wrote the letter to the teapot.
I was sitting on the terrace drinking blue lemonade and counting the ants on the tiles when Zouzi told me he was heading out for a stroll. I knew it was really because he wanted to be first in line for a book signing of I Can Make You Thin.
I didn’t feel like teasing him so I said that I would meet him at the restaurant down the road for dinner. It was a Wednesday, and that is our favourite restaurant day.

So Zouzi went out and I continued to count the ants, which kept moving.

At eight o’clock I was at the restaurant, there was no sign of him, so I waited until 9:30 but he did not show up.

I thought he must have forgotten, so I went back home but he was not there.
I ran to the bookshop but the lights were off and it was locked.
I walked around the streets in the area but he was nowhere.

I became hot and cold and dizzy, dizzy, dizzy and I shouted:
“Zouzi! Zouzi!” so loudly that a lot people gave me angry looks.

I went back home late that night without Zouzi and the apartment was very quiet. Zouzi’s things were everywhere. It was like he was there but he was not. It’s a very upsetting feeling. Do you know it?

I looked everywhere until July 15th . But I did not find him.

On the 16th of July. I stopped leaving my house because I was so worried and I did not want to go anywhere incase he comes back.

Yesterday, on the 19th of September I received a postcard early in the
Morning. The postman said it was the strangest thing he had ever seen. It was a glossy, plain white rectangle; the stamp was light blue but did not indicate any country. There was no return address and the postman said he didn’t even know how it could have been sent.

I held it in my hands and examined it. It was plain and white and glossy with a blue stamp.
I turned it over and saw this message:

I am sad because I miss him. But Zouzi seems to be all right and there doesn’t seem to be much I can do about anything.
I will continue to write to you and tell you about how I see this world and how odd of a place it is.

Perhaps I will make a new friend who will put up with me the way Zouzi did, but until then, it is me with me and with you, if you like.


  1. hmmm... i wonder what it feels like when things are out of your control

  2. noo please find zouzi and tell him to come back! it's all too much to handle!